Having said that snails love reading, i must admit that mine prefer to be read to and they claim this is the most historically authentic way of absorbing literature, quoting oral traditions in Greece and Medieval England.
For a while the escargatoire subscribed to Snaudible but, when they found that too expensive, I began reading aloud to them.
We started, during those long summer evenings in 2026, on A Snail of two Cities with its clear reference to one of their number, Russell, who travels between Paris and London in search of new art to appreciate.
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You have to get very close to truly decode Picasso |
Berowne then offered to head the sessions (he is overly proud of his deep, resonant voice). The photo below shows him on one dark evening encouraging the others to come and listen. They enjoyed Snails of the Unexpected and all took parts acting in The Winter's Snail, fully appreciating the tragi-comedy of fear of not waking from hibernation.
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Wake up: book group starts in 10 |
On a deeper level were The Odysnail, Frankensnail, The Picture of Dorian Snail and Slime and Punishment. The Canterbury Snails excited a demand for a mass pilgrimage which I, Doc Barbara, as responsible owner had to quash. Those who can speak French lapped up Les Miserables Escargots - and the others just slept. I do hope you haven't nodded off also.
The next bit involves Berowne's textual investigations and is particularly soporific. He decoded many snail references in Shakespeare, the most obvious being Hamlet's reference to shuffling off "this mortal coil". This is patently a clear description of the helix on the shell of Cornu aspersum.
The famous lines in Macbeth should, of course, read:
Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow,
Creeps in this carapace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded slime.
I could go on and explain the principle of lectio difficilior but the snails are now all fast asleep - and I expect you are too. It's all on Google if you like abstruse knowledge about weary and hungry monks copying manuscripts by candlelight and making mistakes. They too could get sluggish! Pun intended.
There is a widely held belief that snails are illiterate. This is clearly false. Any brain that can change its own name from Helix aspersa to Cornu aspersum and get the endings right is no slouch at grammar. When they discuss themselves as individuals they even get the plural correct: Cornua aspersa. (Latin information supplied by authoritative Meg Dyson - thanks from me and the snails.)
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| They did NOT enjoy The Handmaid's Snail. |